SelwynDuke.com

Upset about Big Brother's ban on incandescent bulbs? Buy a heatball!

This is just too good.

Many of you know that the federal ban on conventional incandescent light bulbs recently went into effect. And while House Republicans included a provision in a recent spending bill that will block funding for the ban's enforcement, it's said that it will have little effect; manufacturers have prepared for the new standards and will no doubt abide by the law. So does this mean we'll be forced to buy more expensive LED (light emitting diode) or CFL (compact fluorescent light) bulbs, the latter being those squiggly things said to be loaded with mercury? Not if we follow the lead of German businessman Siegfried Rotthaeuser.

Obama's Teleprompter Joins the Occupy Wall Street Movement

This Is the Article That Will Never be Published

By Selwyn Duke

As you may know, the world will end today at 6 p.m.

Or, that’s the prediction at least by 89-year-old California preacher Harold Camping.

Camping had forecast the Earth’s demise before, in 1994, and thus joined a list of errant end-of-worlders that goes back to biblical times and beyond.

Of course, whether you believe in the End Times in the Christian sense or not, you probably know that one of these days Camping, or one of his doomsayer descendants, will likely be right. The collision of two collapsed stars a thousand light years away could yield gamma-ray bursts that would irradiate the Earth into oblivion, and if a “rogue” black hole, which roams about, happened our way, it would act as a big vacuum cleaner/trash compactor that would suck us in and never spit us out. For a slightly more mundane end, our Sun will eventually become a supernova and incinerate us in the blink of an eye. And, even if we should escape this fate by venturing out into space, we’re told that the Universe, which is now expanding, will reverse that process and start contractions that result not in birth, but death.

Read the rest here.

Stinking in America: Is Not Washing the New PC Trend?

By Selwyn Duke

People such as me are often accused of wanting to return to the 19th century. But, if the New York Times is right about a new trend, some on the Left want to go back to the Middle Ages. What is that trend? Avoiding soap, deodorant, and even bathing regularly. Today, though, it’s often for environmental reasons.

It seems that top-notch Western hygiene has now joined SUVs, Wal-Mart, tobacco (not the wacky kind — it’s in fashion), guns, McDonald’s, and white males in the Museum of Politically Incorrect Persons, Places, and Things.

For example, Guardian writer Kira Cochrane tells us about 51-year-old environmentalist Donnachadh McCarthy, who boasts that he’s gotten his water consumption down to about “20 litres a day,” that he’s “as clean as everyone else,” and that he’s trying to reduce his “carbon footprint.”

If I were Donnachadh, I’d be more concerned about my stink footprint.

Read the rest here.

If You’re Not Reading This Article, Please Don’t Vote

By Selwyn Duke

It has become apparent that most Americans simply don’t take voting very seriously.  This is especially true of those who encourage voting.  They’ll tell us that walking into a polling place and pulling a lever is our civic duty, but this isn’t true.  Our civic duty is to cultivate wisdom in ourselves and become conversant with the issues; the walking and pulling part is just a natural by-product of that.

How Liberals Reason

This video speaks for itself.  Give it a gander; I don't think you'll be disappointed.

Hat tip: Walt Holton

Change You Can Believe In: From Bushisms to Obamanisms

By Selwyn Duke

Shortly after Barack Obama was elected, one of his supporters, alluding to George W. Bush’s supposedly lacking intellect, said to me, “I’m just happy to have someone intelligent in the White House.”

I’m sure Rahm Emanuel would be very flattered.

Whatever you think of Bush, admittedly, his habitually knotted tongue did give birth to Bushisms, things such as “misunderestimated.” Cute. Then there are the “Yogiisms” of former baseball player and manager Yogi Berra, pronouncements such as “I think I made the wrong mistake,” which in a sense makes sense (you can get away with some mistakes, but the fatal one will do you in). Now I’m here to tell you that Barack Obama is giving us some new "-isms," and I don’t speak of communism or even socialism. I mean the Obamanism.

Read the rest here.

Would You Rather Have Obama Golf or Govern?

By Selwyn Duke

After seeing Barack Obama’s golf swing, I’m confronted with the staggering possibility that he might actually be better at governing than golfing.  And this is despite the fact that he seems to devote more time to the latter, an impression that has won him much bad publicity.

The Economy is so Bad That . . . .

OK, I usually don't post emails I receive, but this one is just too good.  I hope you enjoy it.

The economy is so bad that:

I got a pre-declined credit card in the mail.

I ordered a burger at McDonald's and the kid behind the counter asked, "Can you afford fries with that?"

CEOs are now playing miniature golf.

Obama Gets What?! That’s Right, the Nobel Peace Prize

The Nobel Foundation once again proves how ignoble it is by giving Barack Obama the Nobel Peace Prize.

By Selwyn Duke

Well, I guess we can say, blessed be the peace makers — because they must be in darn short supply. That’s the only conclusion I can draw when I hear that President Obama — the man who got fawning media treatment for no reason, was elected with a thin resume and exalted without even being a king — has now been given the Noble Peace Prize for, it seems, allegedly having good intentions.

Among those expressing the idea that this was Obama’s sole qualification was the 1984 winner of the prize, Archbishop Desmond Tutu of South Africa. Gregory Katz at Google news quotes him as saying, “In a way, it's an award coming near the beginning of the first term of office of a relatively young president that anticipates an even greater contribution towards making our world a safer place for all. It is an award that speaks to the promise of President Obama's message of hope.” Putting it even more bluntly, Massimo Teodori, billed as a U.S. history expert, said, “For now it's still intentions rather than fully implemented policies, but they are deserving ones.”

Read the rest here.